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Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Just a little goes a long way...

the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best

–verb (used with object)

to look forward to with desire and reasonable confidence.
–verb (used without object)
to feel that something desired may happen

So if you're single (and want to be in a relationship), [I believe] hope is one of the most important things that you can have.  Actually...if you've ever wanted anything at any point in time, hope & faith go hand in hand.  You have to have faith that whatever you ask for or whatever you are hoping for, you will receive in due time.

A really good friend & I were talking one day and she expressed that she has been in a dating slump.  She admitted that she doesn't really get out at all because of work and her new exercise regimen, and that the dates that she goes on are double dates...with her couch & her tv.  I kept telling her that the only way to meet people is to get out of the house.  The only person that she was going to meet staying at home was the delivery takeout person! Well, when my cousin told me about an event that she was hosting, I saw it as the perfect opportunity to invite "Chelsea" out. We went to a speed dating event that my cousin, Orissa Bey of Possibilities Unlimited, was hosting.  Now, we went to her first speed dating event a couple of years ago but Chelsea just sat back and watched. [The only thing that happened for me was that a guy who I'd talked to before was trying to reconnect WHILE his current girlfriend was getting a drink at the bar.] Anyway, Chelsea agreed to meet me there and actually participate this time.

For me, I took the advice of my cousin [and Beyonce] and put my "Freak 'em" dress on for the night.  I was glad that I did because when I got to the venue, my eyes immediately lit up because there were about 15 guys placed at tables around the room (last time there were like 5) and most were handsome.  I get into the rotation, because Chelsea hadn't made it yet, and most of the conversations left me wanting to know more about the guy.  5 minutes started to feel like 2 seconds, and that's pretty rare.  After I have my "date" with the 6th guy, Chelsea walks in.  Every now and again I'll look up and see Chelsea talking to a guy and she actually looks like she's having a good time.  At the end of the last round, Chelsea and I meet up and she's SUPER excited.  She's so happy that she came.  In fact, she was SO pumped that she wanted to give her number to every guy that she talked to.  (After the ladies went on a "date" with the guy, we had to write their number on the back of a slip of paper with our name & phone number and/or email address and they would get it in their bag at the end of the night)

On Saturday, Chelsea BBM'd me to let me know that 2 of the guys had already contacted her.  She was really excited about the experience until they started to work her nerves a couple of days later with little things that they did.  We had a conversation today about the whole situation and for me it put it all into perspective.  She felt like she was on a super high from the experience that has started to wear off and one of the men that she met isn't really what she wants.  I tried to explain to her that it's okay to feel that way.  There is never a 100% (or even 75%) chance that you will find your mate at these events.  When I go to any event, I never know who I'll meet.  Sometimes it gets to be really discouraging when you meet or go out with different guys and they continue to not be a good match for you.  For me, what the Cupids Cousin and Possibilities Unlimited events do is give me opportunity and hope.  They give me the opportunity to meet someone that I normally wouldn't have the opportunity to meet and the hope that there is someone out there who is the ying to my yang, the end all be all, my last first kiss, etc. He might be there [at that event] or he might not be...regardless, it's a new experience and a great opportunity to get out there and meet new people.  When you go into these events with that mindset, you don't leave with any crushed expectations or disappointments...but you should leave with a little more hope.  Hope that the next time might be THAT time or hope that there are some good guys out there and yours is still out there looking for you. 

**As for me, I cast my net pretty wide and picked about 7 guys that I was interested in getting to knowing a little more about (even one who came late and I didn't get the opportunity to talk to but was very handsome lol).  I saw my top pick later that night at my RD's birthday party and he seemed to be pretty interested in me as well.  We'll see if he becomes blog-worthy later on...but no expectations other than to get to know the guys that contact me and see what happens next... (See y'all...I'm growing!)  I left the event with such a positive energy high that I took with me into the birthday party.  I had much more of a good time and I was even approached a lot more!  It's amazing how people are drawn to a positive aura...but I'm sure the dress didn't hurt ;)


  1. Glad that your growing! It doesn't hurt to throw in a freak'em dress every once in a while.