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Monday, August 9, 2010

Sometimes you gotta let go...

Greetings!  I know it's been a while since I've posted but I just didn't know what I wanted to say or how I wanted to say it.  I want to make sure that if I post something, it's because I really felt the need to share and not because I just wanted to have a post for that week.  So #withthatbeingsaid I feel the need to share...

I have two friends and I somehow always get caught in the middle of their quarrels.  As soon as one does something to the other, I get a notification.  Now, I have a special relationship with both, but they are a lot closer.  Now I know, from experience, that everyone's friendship is not the same.  But, I also feel that you and your close friends should not question your friendship every month or every other month.  It can get to be exhausting.

Everytime they come to me, seperately, I have to explain that part of being in a friendship/relationship is that you have to understand AND accept the other's faults/weaknesses.  "You gotta take the good and the bad, the happy with the sad..." If you aren't willing to do that, then your friendship is destined for disaster.  I also have to explain that no friendship will withstand the tests of time if you don't have a good foundation.  You have to be able to communicate with that person AND be able to trust them with your thoughts, feelings, hurt, pain, etc.  And that's their issue...one doesn't trust the other and the other doesn't know how to effectively communicate and she doesn't trust her. Another issue, is that one bases her interaction with the other on relationships that others have with their close friends.  I tried to explain that the dynamics in everyone's friendships are not the same.  For example, I don't tell my close friends everything because sometimes, with everything that's going on in my life, I just don't remember or I might not feel that it's important enough to interrupt their day.  That doesn't mean that our friendship should be questioned, it just means that I might need to invest in some Gingko Biloba. I also have told both that sometimes if the bad times outweigh the good, you have to fall back and just love them from a distance and in a different way. 

Bright Side: I don't know what else to say so now I just make sure that I'm just a listening ear and hope that in time, things will work out for the better.

6 comments:

  1. 1.) Do ur friends read your blog?
    2.) Would these two friends recognize themselves if they read this?
    Jus curious.....

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  2. Good Morning! I know that they have in the past and I'm sure that they will. But, when I write a post that includes someone else, I only include the parts that I am directly involved in and I don't give too many details.

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  3. As a "friend" of either party you probably should have shared that with the "friends" face to face while they were both present. This would allow you to let them know that you do not enjoy being the "middle man" and that they should work it out themselves.....That's if you are a friend to either one of them.

    FYI I know exactly who your talking about so you gave enough details....

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  4. Well it's a good thing that neither party has a problem with my post.

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  5. not so sure about that....

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  6. I've spoken to both & I'm certain that neither have a problem.

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