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Friday, September 24, 2010

Detours and Roadblocks

So as many of you know (and have read), I've had my share of dating disasters but I haven't let it stop me. Last Saturday night I went to see Tyler Perry's stage play "Madea's Big Happy Family" with my family for my mother's birthday. The play was pretty good but close to the end of the show, Madea started speaking to the audience and she said something that really hit home for me. She said that the path to finding the right mate is like driving from point A to point B. While driving you come across various detours and road blocks but they don't stop you from making it to your final destination. Those detours and road blocks could be considered the dating disasters that you come across on the journey to "The One". When facing these obstacles, you have to keep moving and persevering; you can't let it break your stride because God has the person for you at the end of your journey. If you stop after a couple (or in my case a lot) of bad dates, then you might miss out on the love that you're in search of. I get really anxious at times to know who I'm going to be with or just to have that steady companionship (i.e. when I see EVERYONE around me boo'd up, weddings, holidays, when my friends can't go out because they have plans with their "significant others", etc.), but I (my friends) have to keep reminding myself that I'm probably not really ready for it yet. It's funny because a friend of mine and I were talking about why the guys that we think are so perfect for us never work out. [Personally, I think I jinx myself because every time I mention something about meeting a new guy or I bring him around my friends, it ends in less than a week (hmm...maybe I should stop talking about it...yea right! Like that's gonna happen. lol)]. But she said that she calls it the "Thank You Jesus" moments, because it always seems like when you see them later on in life you're just thankful that you dodged that bullet. lol At that time, you didn't realize that there was a higher power working on your behalf, but it's like they say "If I knew then what I know now..."

But, let's enjoy the time with ourselves, our friends, and our families and keep your mind and your heart open. And remember to always look to The Bright Side!

Friday, September 17, 2010


Good Morning!  It's Friday and I get to go see Mr. Tyler Perry's play tomorrow and I'm TOO EXCITED!  My apologies for not posting an update sooner but y'all, between trying to get a good price (and interest rate) for a new car and grad school...I'm beat and my mind is almost jelly!  But anywho...let's get to this update!

So my last post was about my neighbor that I was crushing on...yea....that didn't go so well.  Last Friday night I was supposed to go to a friend's birthday dinner but I really didn't feel like going anywhere.  After going back & forth with the idea in my head (and with my brother & my LP), I decided to see if the neighbor wanted to hang out.  The conversation went like this...

Me: Hey, what are you doing?
CN: Can you believe I'm getting ready to go on a date?  Wish me luck!
(Err...yes he actually said that)
Me: Fun Times!

So...needless to say that I was a little disappointed because who wants to hear from someone that their interested in that they're going on a date...with someone other than you?  Uhh...not me!  But now I know where we stand so there's no question about that anymore. Oh well...I guess another one bites the dust!

Bright Side:  I used that as motivation to get up and get out!  After I received that message, I got up and went to dinner and then out with my friends (and had a FABULOUS time).  He text me on Tuesday to see how I was doing and (in my mind) I switched him over from the "interest" category to the "we cool" category and I was able to converse with him like one of the homies.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Crushing: The Neighbor

Happy Friday (and Labor Day weekend)!  You don't know how much I've been waiting on this break!

If you've been reading my posts for a while, then you know that I've mentioned my neighbor who I thought was really, really cute then I changed my mind and was like ehh...he's ok.  Well!  I don't know what happened but a couple of weeks ago I saw him in the hallway and I thought that I should introduce myself.  Maybe a week after that I ended up sitting in his kitchen talking and we had a really good conversation.  I found out that we went to the same college (but he's 36 so he was there about 10 years before I even thought about that school), he has a 5 year old son, his occupation, his education, the basics and a little more. The next night he sends me a text and asks me to come help him install a new toilet seat cover.  Now I was thinking "Umm...that's random, even for me" but I enjoyed the conversation the night before so I went.  It was a little awkward at first because who asks someone to help them install a new toilet seat, how is this a 2 person job? lol but I just stood back and enjoyed the view (Y'all...he has really, really nice arms).  In the end, the toilet seat wasn't even long enough so I went back home.  The next night, he had the bright idea to play UNO.  I proceeded to whoop him both at his apt and in mine...of course, he wants a rematch.  After spending time talking and interacting with him, I have developed a crush on my neighbor. I think the feeling is mutual but I don't know.  The first couple of weeks after we started hanging out, he text me everyday for almost 2 weeks straight.  Now, me being the anaytical thinker that I am...I noticed that the texts came at different times of day with just random "How are you?" messages.  Now with all of this communication and interaction, he has yet to ask me out.  So I'm a little confused as to what's really going on?

Last weekend he told me that he was going out of town and he sent out a mass text message about an event that was going on Downtown and he included that a line that said "this would be a good date night if you're looking to pur a smile on someone's face..."  I responded with a LOL at that line and we got into a conversation about women asking men out.  His view is that women don't ask because we're scared of rejection and that you'll never know unless you ask.  My view is that a man should show his interest by asking the woman out and once his interest is established, then the possibilities would be endless. Now we've chit-chatted off & on since then but it hasn't been anything like our previous interaction so I'm a little confused on his position (level of interest) so I asked my fav blogger & my brother their opinion.  My brother seems to think that he is interested and my fav feels that I've been put in the "friend zone"...again.  That is NOT where I'm trying to be!  She agreed that I don't need to ask him out but that a 37 year old man with a child knows what he wants.  She also told me that to move out of "the zone" I could hang in there, ask him out, or move around...  So that's where I am now...trying to figure out what I want to do without making myself look "thirsty." (My lease is not up till next year so I wouldn't want to turn my pleasant hallway experience into an awkward one...I'm no good at awkward)

Your thoughts and opinions? 

Bright Side: Since he lives in the gym, he gave me a workout/meal plan to he's been checking up on me with that.  I told him to throw away my Blue Bell Cookies & Cream ice cream so that I wouldn't be tempted.  He also still wants a rematch at Uno so if nothing else comes of it, I'll still have reasons to get a peek at his arms. Lol  I know...I'm horrible!